Last week I had the pleasure of introducing my dear friend and fellow parent coach Kim Muench. Here is an excerpt from Kim’s brand new book, Becoming Me While Raising You: A Mother’s Journey to Her Self.
They say you can never be fully prepared to parent; I believe this is the truth. We could, however, better know our authentic selves and have clarity around who we believe we are. Instead, in order to please our parents, before we even know we are doing it, we take on beliefs and identities that simply aren’t true in order to gain love and acceptance. In the same unconscious state, we then project the pattern onto our kids. It is time for this to stop.
I was naive to believe once I delivered my son Nick into an inpatient treatment program everything would be fine and, although we’d definitely remember all we’d been through the past several months, life would go back to “normal”. Addiction, whether it’s to alcohol, drugs, shopping, sex, gambling, or whatever, is a disease. There are ups and downs and we experienced our share of both with Nick for some time after inpatient treatment.
It takes courage to change generational patterns and you are in the driver’s seat of the relationship with your children. No, you cannot control them [especially as they continue through the teen years], and if you try and do so you will create power struggles, tension, and disconnection. Instead, you can hold dear the sacred relationship you have with them and come from a place of love which breeds connection. The world needs this more than ever today.
Connect with Kim.
Buy the book Becoming Me While Raising You: A Mother’s Journey to Her Self.
Watch a clip from Kim’s digital TV Show Becoming Me While Raising You